The Working Mom

Last week, Rachel was with a friend and got herself into a situation that she wasn’t entirely comfortable with, and couldn’t easily contact me to get her. She was at a sleepover, and even though the parents I had entrusted her care to thought they weren’t doing anything wrong, they did. (I don’t want to get into specifics, but because obviously this can easily be taken the wrong way, I’ll just say this has to do with a religion issue and not anything else). I was furious, and while I learned a hard lesson about the fact that, unfortunately, I’m going to have to be a lot more careful about who I allow her to have sleepovers with and who I trust, I also realized I need to give her the ability to more easily reach out to me if she needs to.

She’s been begging me for a cell phone for maybe a year or more now and it’s been one of those things that I’ve honestly laughed at. A nine year old with a cell phone?? You’ve GOT to be kidding me!!! Well… now my tune is changing. Fact is – if she had a cell phone at that sleepover, when things started getting a little over the top, she could have snuck away and called me and said “Mom? Uhm… Think I’m ready to come home now!”

Of course, being 9 years old, there’s all kinds of issues here. One problem is that I’m reasonbly sure this phone is going to get lost. Sooner rather than later, I’ll bet. The other issue is that, I can’t be 100% sure that she’ll forever get the idea that this phone is not to be used to chat it up with her friends. It’s to be used for me to contact her or her to contact me. If she wants to talk to her friends, we do actually have a landline phone she can use to her heart’s content. (Or at least until it’s time to do her homework or go to bed. LOL!)

So, after much debate, we finally got her one of those Tracfones. The particular model we got for her actually does text messaging, (so I can easily send her a text message to come home from her friends house at a specified time, if need be – and it only uses up 1/3 of a minute), it has voicemail, even a little camera. You buy minutes via a card (and actually the model phone we got doubles the minutes you buy for the life of the phone) – and if she uses up the minutes – that’s it – the phone stops working until we add more minutes. There’s no monthly or daily charge. And it’s not tied to our credit card. So no worries about a surprise $500 phone bill because she decided to sneak a few calls to some friends. And the phone itself only cost about $20. So while I really hope she doesn’t lose the phone – it’s only $20. It’s not like $200. And the phone? I mean for $20… that’s a pretty sweet deal – which is why I finally caved. I mean, I think I couldn’t get a decent walkie-talkie for only that much!

So yeah – I’m pretty sure only a few months ago I was saying “I would never buy my kid a cell phone!! Not until they’re at least 13 or something…” Yeah. Funny how circumstance will change things. That and the technology that can put out a $20 cell phone!

Why is it that just to take a week off requires several weeks prior of insanity. I’ve easily gone a week without anyone contacting me here and there, or with clients forgetting to get me stuff. But as soon as I say the words “I’m going to be taking a few days off” it’s like I’ve just told them I’ll be gone for several months and they’ll be on their own. My brother and his family are coming into town and he’s rented a townhouse up in the mountains for the week. So this was part of the push for me to learn how to ski this year, because I wanted to to be able to ski with everyone.

Anyway, that’s what I’ve been doing. The Pre-vacation Panic. It sounds like it should be some kind of line-dance. I’ll bet it looks alot like people running around and bumping into each other and getting knocked out. At least, that’s what I’ve felt like I’ve done at the end of each day.

(Side note: I have a list of iPhone apps I’ve recently purchased and have been playing with, so stay tuned, I’ll have tons of that stuff to talk about soon – in the meantime, I leave you with another installment of my learn-to-ski saga)

So back to the slopes we went this weekend. I probably would have preferred to either take a break for at least a week after last weekend’s fiasco (and the fact that the Sundance Film Festival is going on right now up there), but I kind of had to go. I had filled out a customer comment form on the resort’s website and told them about the various problems I’d had – the first lesson, with all the equipment issues I had, then of course was last weekend where the class had been much more advanced than I had wanted. I got a call from the director of skier services and we talked a bit about how the classes are supposed to be run – obviously there was some miscommunication that landed me in the class I ended up in. He promised to have my favorite instructor be the one teaching the class I needed for the following Sunday if I came back to give it another try. So I had to go.

That instructor is a ski-goddess. I love her. I really do. If you are in the area (Park City, UT), (and especially if you are new to skiing and want to learn) and want to take a lesson with the most awesome instructor that ever was – let me know and I will give you her contact info. She has just the right balance of understanding my fears, but also getting me over them so I can progress. I never feel like she’s talking “down” to me, and even when I’m trying to deal with a kind of silly fear (like my panic attack on the chair lift) she never made me feel bad about it, but still got me totally over it.

So the class started off on the bunny slopes I was comfortable with. She gave us a few little pointers to improve what we were doing, then up to the big slope we went. The same one I was “Yard Sale-ing” on last week. (I was told by a friend that it is passe to call it “face plants” – and that the cool kids call it a yard sale. This totally baffled me why someone would call it a yard sale until I saw this video. Then I understood… Ah… they call it a yard sale because your gear goes in all directions all over the mountain like you’re having a yard sale. LOL! Got it.) Before going up, she looked at me to make sure I was ok with the idea LOL! I told her I trusted her, and I totally do. If she thought I could do it, then I believed her.

I’m sure that part of the problem last week was it was really new territory for me and I just didn’t have the same kind of confidence in that instructor that I do in this one. But also, I knew that if I started to have problems, she would be right there to help me out.

Ironically, this time, I had no trouble on the run. I didn’t fall once. I didn’t lose control once. I joked with the instructor that now she’s in for it, because I think I just need her to be my personal lifelong ski coach. LOL! I will admit that I was still quite a bit nervous and I have this little mantra going in my head. It’s totally ridiculous, but it does help. When I start to get a little nervous, I just say over and over in my head “You can ski! You can ski! You KNOW how to do this!” LOL! Like I have to convince myself I know what I’m doing. But you know what, as soon as the mantra in my head starts, I start to ski better.

The run we did was about 3-1/2 miles I think, but part of it we did twice, so it ended up being about 5 miles. Downhill. No falls. I DID IT!

So now I think I’m done with the lessons for awhile and will probably just be sking this run (a green run) and maybe a few other green runs they have at the resort. I’m skiing now at the level I wanted to be at – so now it’s just doing it over and over again until I feel really strong on it.

Meanwhile, Rachel was skiing blue runs in her class (kids learn so easily. It’s so not fair. LOL!) And Zach also was really improving. We put him in their all day program and he had a blast. The instructor was really impressed with how well he’s picking this up. He said he was listening really well (that alone is impressive!! LOL!).

Not sure if we’ll get up there next weekend. The Sundance film festival is still going on, but by getting there early we didn’t have trouble getting parking at the resort. Sam is on call with work, so he can’t be away from the computer for the whole day like that. But Rachel and I might go up just ourselves. Now that I can do that green run, I know she won’t be overly bored with skiing with me.

So no sooner do I make this post, my son turns the table on me. Who knows, maybe he can read, AND he reads my blog and figured he confuse me. Almost since the very moment I hit publish on that post, he’s been a lot better behaved. I won’t even presume to say he’s over his “phase,” I know he’s not. And it’s not like he’s given up tantrums and whining 100% – he’s just turned them down to once/twice a day and turned down the duration from several hours to just a few minutes. I can TOTALLY live with this.

The other thing – and I’m not sure what to make of this – is “manners” has become a game to him. It’s become “fun” to try and come up with as many things to thank me for as possible. This… is really weird. Don’t get me wrong – I am loving the appreciation, but I feel like there’s got to be a catch somewhere.

“Thank you Mommy for making me dinner”
“You’re welcome”
“Thank you Mommy for the spoon”
“You’re welcome”
“Thank you Mommy for the napkin”
“You’re… welcome…”
“Thank you Mommy for the water”
“uh… actually you got yourself a cup of water…”
“Oh… then thank you for the cup so I could get myself some water”
“uh… you’re… welcome..?”

He’s got to be plotting something. Trying to distract me so he can catch me off guard. This just isn’t normal.

Well, still, I guess I’ll be blissfully ignorant (and slightly paranoid) in the meantime. However, I’m sure that clicking the “publish” button on this post is a guarantee this momentary blip will come to an end. It sure was cute while it lasted!

I have to start by saying that I absolutely adore my son. I love him with every fiber in me. But… (you knew it was coming, right?) I feel like we’ve been in a phase with him that has been never-ending. I know he’s not the worst behaved kid in the world, but he is far from one of the better behaved kids. It’s like we’re walking on egg-shells – anything can set him off, and once that happens he will range from either just being generally whiney to on-the-floor tantrum. Keeping him happy is really hard work and he’s extremely high maintenance.

After the presents were opened on Christmas, we spent the rest of the day trying to prevent the kids from killing each other. I read tweets from other people who were “spending a quiet afternoon with their family”… how exactly does one do that? If the kids are home, especially if Zach is home – there is no such thing as a quiet afternoon.

This weekend I took the kids to see The Princess and The Frog (which I LOVED by the way. Great movie! Yes, scary in parts, but not as bad as some other Disney movies I’ve seen!) Long story short – Zach basically had a total screaming meltdown after the movie that lasted a good two hours and ended up making me sick with a migraine.

We are trying to figure out how to restrict his access to the house overnight – otherwise he will literally ransack the place. He gets into and empties out cabinets he knows he’s not allowed to get into (this includes breaking through “childproof” locks), he gets things out of the fridge and leaves them all over the house. I don’t know if it’s a sleep-walking thing, but because he seems so proud of himself when we wake up and discover what he’s done, I’m not sure.

I joked on Twitter the other day that I wondered if there really was a Nanny911. I’d love for them to come in and help me out. I’m not talking about going to one of those “Love and Logic” seminars – or following the advice of a book (I’ve read a bunch). I’m talking about someone coming in and seeing our specific problems and coaching me on how to deal with it. The things that happen in my house never seem to follow the examples in the books or seminars. I need a Nanny911!

There’s so many cute things that go along with a child who is 4 years old, but there is so much going on with him that makes me can’t wait until this phase is over. (Please let this all just be a phase). I read about other moms who get so upset watching their kids get older – meanwhile, I’m the complete opposite. And at the same time I feel like I’m missing out on something. Why is this all so difficult? Why can’t it all be just games and fun and snuggling. I mean there is that too, but it’s overshadowed with so much whining and tantrums and bothering his sister for no reason at all…

I know it’ll get better. But sometimes I’d like someone to tell me how much longer. Are we there yet?

Added after: Ironically, I was talking with my mother about my nephew who is just a month older than Zach, and his behavior recently is apparently just about the same as Zach’s. So hopefully that’s some proof that it’s not just ME/MY FAULT he’s acting this way and it’s more to do with his age and he’ll grow out of it. Eventually. Heh.

I hope everyone had a good Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, Winter Solstice or other holiday of your choice The last few weeks have been insanely busy with work projects, and various holiday projects.

I was able to do the Hanukkah presentation for Rachel’s class with minimal problems. My plan to talk “off-the-cuff” as little as possible worked. I read a book. We sang a few songs (many of them the students already knew from previous years of my coming in there), I had the kids play dreidel, and then I brought in latkes. That was probably the biggest challenge. Due to health laws – I’m not allowed to bring in homemade food, so the latkes had to be store-bought. So the first challenge was finding a store that would make them. I convinced the local Harmon’s grocery store to make them for me in their deli department, but then at the last minute they decided they were too busy to actually do it. (I can’t even tell you how pissed I still am at them for pulling that stunt). The one good thing that came out of it was that they told me that they thought that Whole Foods might make them. Which was true – and I didn’t even have to twist their arm and beg. In fact, when I explained what I needed the latkes for, they offered to make up a special batch for me of “smaller” latkes for the kids (their “normal” size was HUGE – their “smaller” size is closer to what I would have considered “normal”). But the the problem was that they refused to give them to me heated up. And I wasn’t given access to the school’s cafeteria, so I had to heat them up on warming platters in the class. They were still on the “cooler” side, but they still tasted good. All the kids seemed really excited to try them.

Christmas went well too. The kids were spoiled rotten, although there were a fair share of present fails – I think Santa is beginning to look like an idiot. (Well, at least he’ll take the blame for a few more years until the kids figure it out). Rachel got a “designer nail” kit – which apparently was only an “add on” to a larger (more expensive) kit – which she doesn’t have. Oops. Zachary got a Wii game which is totally too difficult for him to play. He also got a computer game which doesn’t work on his computer. Oops. There were other presents that didn’t suck, thankfully – Rachel got a few Harumika sets, a Miley Cyrus CD (which she has been playing over and over and over and over again. Ugh.) Zachary got a few Bakugans and a marble tower building thing.

And me? Between Hanukkah and Christmas (and Thanksgiving) – basically a month+ of holidays and food… I am sitting at a good 5lbs heavier than when the holidays started. I know I’ve been “bad” – but the holidays are difficult on a diet. I wanted to enjoy them without worrying so much about every calorie. I knew I would gain, but the deal I made with myself was that as quickly as I could afterwards I would get it back together again. So here I am. Again. For the millionth time. But that’s what it’s all about.

I tried the LoseIt! iPhone app before – but I do like being able to enter stuff into the computer as well as the iPhone. Sometimes, if I have A LOT of stuff to enter, the iPhone’s interface becomes a real hurdle. So I end up skipping an entry… and one thing leads to another… and you get the idea. So I’ve signed up again with MyFoodDiary. It’s still a little overkill for what I want, and some things I still find annoying and wish I could turn off, but it has the main important features I want – iphone accessible (they have a mobile version of their site) and the ability to enter via computer as well. It’s too bad I don’t get a “referral kick-back” for the number of times I mention them on this site, but I don’t. I just like their service.

Our New Year’s is always quiet, so I shouldn’t have too much to worry about there – so today is my first day back on track.

The other morning, before dropping Zach off at daycare, he asked me “what squirrels were made of.”

The things is – he sometimes asks me questions like this when he already has an answer in his head. When I mentioned Zach’s question to my Facebook friends, my friend Jamie replied that when she asked her son the same question to see what he would say, he said “Skin and Fur” – but I know that wasn’t what was in Zach’s mind. I explained it was as if he expecting me to say that squirrels were made of chicken or something…

To which Jamie gave me this reply:

Speaking of chicken, Alex was eating a chicken nugget the other day and asked me what chicken nuggets were made of. I told him chicken of course and I guess it was the first time he ever realized he was eating an animal, his eyes got huge and said, “a bock bagock chicken?” “Yep” “The kind with feathers?” “Yep” “So there’s a chicken in my belly?”…. at which point the conversation got really weird and uncomfortable trying to explain how it’s ok to eat animals that are raised for food, but not ok to bite his brother…

ROFL!!! I’m still cracking up over that.

Later that night, I asked Zach to tell me what he thought squirrels were made of. His answer? “nuts“

I guess you are what you eat…

I know, I already wished everyone a Happy Thanksgiving… but I wanted to make another post. I just found a cool image plugin “freebie image” – that will let you search, and download photos for your blogs posts from within WordPress and wanted to make a post to test it out. Pretty Neat.

Anyway – so that’s (obviously) where the photo comes from.

Ok that’s all. Happy Thanksgiving. For real this time.

Holidays are especially rough when you don’t live near family. You look out the window and see that everyone’s driveway in the neighborhood is full with visitors. Meanwhile, your house is nearly empty. Just a tad bit depressing. My parents know this, so whenever they can, they try to spend some of the holidays with us. So I’m really glad they’ll be coming for Thanksgiving this year. They won’t be able to stay too long, just the long weekend – but I’ll take what I can get!

My mom usually cooks dinner – even if it’s at my house. I don’t mind. I’m not the greatest cook, so my daughter and I act as her “sous chefs” But because they won’t be here until the night before Thanksgiving, I’ve been tasked with going out and getting all the ingredients. As fate would have it – I just haven’t had a ton of time to get out and do this task and have scheduled to do it tomorrow morning. Wednesday. The day before Thanksgiving.

I know, I know… it’s going to be insanity at the grocery store. I’m just hoping that everyone else in this town is more organized than me (which is probably not too far from the truth). I DO at least already have the turkey! It’s been sitting thawing in the Fridge – so I’m not completely out of my mind. (I already made that mistake one year. If I recall correctly – we had to try to “quick” thaw the turkey with hot water. NOT an easy task with a huge turkey!!) But the rest of the ingredients are staples that I just can’t expect to suddenly disappear from the shelves. Green beans? Sweet Potatoes? I don’t really want all this food sitting around my house until we need it. We don’t have room!

Maybe this will be another year a “lesson” is learned. I’m hoping not. Either way, the available time just isn’t there.

In any case, I’ll be enjoying company the next few days. (Hopefully with all the food we have planned! LOL!) Hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving!!

I saw an ad for this website in someone’s sidebar recently and clicked it to see what it was. This company lets you design your own monster and then they’ll actually make it for you. It looks pretty cool. But even if you don’t go through the full step of BUYING the monster – I thought the “design and print your own monster” wizard they had was really cool. I think Zach would probably like playing with that. (Unfortunately, he’s figured out how to print from the computer so I’m sure once he makes a monster, he’ll be printing several hundred copies of it to decorate the house with!)

*disclosure: I just signed up as an affiliate (figured I might as well since I was going to link to them anyway). So if you click the image above and make a purchase, I do get a commission.