The importance of friends

This week I’ve been reminded by how important my friends are to me. With no family near by, my friends are my family here. I spend most of my time glued to my computer, and while I do have interactions with a number of people online and virtually, there is still something unique to be gained by getting out of the house and meeting in person with like-minded individuals. I met a good friend for lunch today. Our sons are the same age, we used to be in another mom’s group together and be in the same playgroup. I stopped going to that group a long while ago, but she and I still stayed in touch sporadically. We try to meet up every few months and catch up. It was so energizing to talk with her today. And then again tonight I met up with the mom’s group I’m in. I come home feeling so empowered and strong. This is not a feeling I have felt walking away from any online interaction.

Whether you are a stay at home mom, or working mom, or work at home mom; I think we forget to take time for ourselves. I know I am a much more balanced, happy, and strong person from the in-person interactions I have with my friends. I know so many moms so focused on how well socialized their children are – our own socialization is just as important!

It was one of the smartest things I did before we moved – I knew we were moving to a new area where we knew no one and even more difficult was a strong and widespread culture of which I was not a part of. I knew finding my own niche of friends would be critical in order for me not to lose my mind completely. That is the mom’s group I’m in now – a group specifically formed for moms in my exact situation. I joined the group within the first few weeks of our arrival here, and have been meeting with them ever since. It’s changed over the years, some members have come and gone, some have moved away – but the idea is still basically the same, and I am so thankful to have them. I think I take it for granted that I have that escape and the group of people I can recharge with. Sometimes I’ll skip meeting up with them and (WHY???!?!) opt to continue working instead. So I’m putting this out there as a reminder to myself too – nothing can replace the getting out, that in-person connection. And it is so important.

2 Comments

  1. Margie
    Aug 24, 2009

    This is so true. My job keeps me as glued to the PC as a lot of my volunteer activities do, so I really treasure the way-too-limited time I spend with my friends. We got into the habit of going to brunch together once a month. If you can’t come one month, no big deal – you’ll come the next. We also do little retreats throughout the year, and at least once or twice a year we have a potluck so the hubs (who all know each other, too) and kids (those that are home; most of us have grown kids) can join in, too.

    Amazing how important those brunch Sundays have become to me!!

  2. Jennifer
    Aug 24, 2009

    Hi Margie! Yea, the moms group I’m in meets every other week in the evenings (they do stuff during the day too for those with younger kids). I think the pre-planned stuff like that is great. I think the hard part is the PLANNING. When it’s just part of the routine/schedule – it’s so much easier.

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